Suicide

I have been deeply bothered by the news I've seen last night. 2 new reported incidents of suicide committed by students who failed to pass their class. I am saddened that they had to resort to suicide as a last option to their problems. Most parents didn't even see this coming or are in denial of what is about to happen.

I've known a few people (friends and family) who had episodes of depression that sometimes lead to trying to commit suicide. I for one, had had an episode and thought about ending my life's battle at one point. My sister even tried cutting her wrist with a broken mirror. A neighbor of ours hanged herself some 25 years ago. And the list goes on.

In one of my sister's depression episode, the moment when she realized she failed her board exam, she didn't eat for a few days, kept herself locked in her room and doesn't want to talk to anyone not even to our mom. I brought her to our house and somehow forced her to talk to me. We cried, hugged, and showed her that we all love her and that the board exam is not the end of the world for her and that we understand where she's coming from. In a week's time, she's back to her normal self. She regained her confidence and even passed the following board exam.

In my opinion, everyone can and will experience depression at least once in their lifetime. But not everyone will think of committing suicide because we have different ways of handling our issues. At some point, a depressed person can think that there's nobody there for them, that they are and feel alone. This is where family and friends can help. We all should be able to identify the signs of depression and be there for the ones we love in case this happens.

Stroke

When I went back to the hospital Tuesday morning days after mama was rushed to the hospital, her doctor confirmed through CT Scan that it was indeed stroke. We initially thought it was a mild stroke due to her symptoms but her doctor said there was a blockage on one of her artery that caused the stroke. In mama's case, it was an Ischaemic Stroke. 

After more than a week in the hospital she was finally allowed to go home with continued medication and rehabilitation. She just needs to maintain a consistent low blood sugar count and blood pressure and daily exercise so she could move her left arm, foot and leg. 

With the help of my sister, who is a nurse, we're all hoping she would get better in no time. Please continue to pray for her recovery. 

mama and papa

Summary of My 2012 (First Half) In Pictures

2012.... The year I discovered I'm a different person than 10 years ago. It was a whirlwind of emotions, a struggle and lifestyle change. It's the year I discovered a lot about myself. It's the year that changed me.

January 4, 2012 marks the start of our house's first amortization. We managed to complete our first year of down payment. It was tough but we're so glad we made it. Apart of feeling excited, we were also feeling a bit of doubt if we can make it. Working 2-3 jobs a day was tough for me, I hardly sleep but it was well worth it. We also had the chance to see the house construction first hand.

January 8, 2012 was Jeff's 30th birthday bash. We celebrated it with his family in Vikings MOA. I especially liked this photo of us strolling in MOA grounds after the hefty buffet. It constantly serves as a reminder that it's the two of us in our own life story and that whatever life brings us, we will be facing each trial together.

January 9, 2012 when I became the official manager of Connected Acoustic Band. I now serve the band as the photographer, marketing manager and customer service for the bands' booking inquiries.

February 4, 2012 when Papi gave me his best pasalubong ever. Technically it's his Christmas gift to me but I have to pay him half of the DSLR's price. Thanks Papi!

February 7, 2012 was our third year anniversary as a married couple. Since our budget's pretty tight we decided to just spend it in Hotel H20 in Manila. Instead of the usual out of town trip, we we're already satisfied with the short vacation.

February 25, 2012, mom, sis and I went up to Baguio for an adventure. It was a first for us to travel during the Panagbenga Festival, it was tiring, a bit stressful in finding a hotel but the experience was well worth it.

March 8, 2012 when we had the worst Yakimix experience. As you have already noticed, dining out has been my husband and I's stress reliever and dining in different buffets had been my temporary heaven. But out of all the branches Jeff and I tried, our experience in Yakimix Trinoma had been the worst.

April 4, 2012 was Jeff's brother, Jonathan's 29th birthday. We celebrated it with his whole family at the Galilee Resort in Bustos, Bulacan.

April 20, 2012 was my 3+ birthday. I celebrated it with Jeff, mom, sis and bro. We brought them to Manila Ocean Park and Star City.

May 2012, house was completed and installed with the electric post. Such a beautiful house.

May, 2012, we celebrated Mama Seth's birthday in SM MOA and dined in fab resto, Ibon.

June 2012 when we finally got the permit to occupy for the house we've been paying for the past couple of years. Jeff and I were both excited about the idea of finally moving in.

June 2012, mom had a simple celebration at home for her 18th (kidding) birthday.

Mama's Sick

Imagine your life when you were just a kid, when your mom and dad would chase you around while you're playing in the park? Those years when they were still healthy, not an ounce of clue that they would someday get sick and be frail. I miss those days when we would just stroll the mall and mom wouldn't be too tired with walking for hours and hours. Dad even used to teach me a thing or two about karate and play with me before we sleep. Yes they were that healthy.

Those were the years I terribly miss.

Just three years ago, days before my wedding, we learned that Papa would have to be operated immediately due to gallstones. He had it rescheduled a day after the wedding because he doesn't want to miss the very special event of my life. I knew he was in pain then but still stayed till the program finished. Papa's a photography enthusiast since I was young and had taken great pictures but during the wedding, when we looked at his DSLR photos, they were all blurry, reminding me that during the time he's taking the photos, he's already in pain. Papa's operation was successful but still, he's no longer able to do the activities he used to enjoy.

Just two days ago, while working from home, my sister was constantly sending me text messages that our mom isn't feeling well and is feeling numb on her left part of the body from shoulder to foot. I was already worried but I had no choice as I was working and I'm at least two hours away from them. Around 3AM when my sister said they need to rush mom to the hospital because she could no longer bear the numbness. I was so worried that right after my shift at 6AM I went straight to the hospital.

Mom is still in the hospital to go through different tests and we're still awaiting for the results. Oh, how I wish I can bring back the time when they both are healthy and out of danger. It's just sad that we have to go through this pain sooner or later. I'm afraid to even think about bringing them to the hospital.

Please join me in praying for my mom.